Every year, Christmas feels a little less like Christmas. (Stay with me here, I promise I have a point.) There are presents under the tree and non-stop carols on Y94 FM just like usual, but somehow it feels like just another snowfall, just another day, just another event to plan and think about. Not that it bothers me - I love taking the opportunity to reflect on and appreciate how blessed our lives are - it's just that December 25th used to be a date that I looked forward to beyond all others. I lived for those advent calendars with chocolate behind the windows and the red and green paper chains we made in school. And when I would think "Only eleven days to Christmas," my breath would catch and my heart would race. I don't know when I lost that enthusiasm. Honestly, when's the last time you were so excited for something that you couldn't sleep?
Well, here I am, eleven days to my Peace Corps service, and I have finally found my missing anticipation! Don't get me wrong, eleven days is not a very long time to have to wait, but I just wish it was here now. Also, it is extremely relieving to know that I am not so jaded that I can't feel excitement anymore.
On the other hand, I have a hell of a lot to do in those eleven days, but I'll just give you the highlights. This weekend is going to be full of seeing old friends, and I'm really excited about it. Thursday morning I'm driving to Buffalo to see my best friend from high school, Sarah. Then hopefully that night my friend Rusty from SHU is going to come visit for the night. Also, my really good friend Meghan is going to be home this weekend for Easter. On top of all this, my brother Adam is coming home tomorrow and staying through the weekend! He puts in sooo many hours at his job, I'm ecstatic that he can spend so much time at home before I leave. Despite how excited I am to leave, I would never want to go without saying goodbye to those who mean the most to me.
It's also very important to me that I don't leave with unfinished business. For the past week or so I've kinda been in despair thinking that I would be leaving for two years without all the relationships in my life settled, one way or another. I think it's human nature (and if not, then it's most definitely my nature) to need to be on good terms with everyone before being able to move on. Maybe people who have made appearances in my life don't require this same peace of mind, but I sure do, and happily I think my loose ends are finally all tied up, and I'm feeling really good about life.
"Some people should be around your entire life, and some should just make an appearance." - Greek
tess, this is gorgeous! good luck with your travels, and post much as much you can!!!
ReplyDelete